Legend has it St. Nick used to reward misbehaving children with bundles of twigs, bags of salt and strings of garlic. Considering these alternatives, a lump of fossil fuel doesn’t sound half bad. Duke Cannon honors this tradition with his Big Ass Lump of Coal, a premium soap formulated with activated charcoal and featuring the masculine scent of bergamot and black pepper. It’s the best way to clean up after mischief and shenanigans.

• • 3x bigger and better smelling than traditional lumps of coal
• • According to cindy in accounting, this is a “super cute” gift for guys
• • May encourage mischief or general tomfoolery
• • A portion of proceeds benefits veteran and active duty military
• • Made with activated charcoal for a deeper and more trend-forward, clean
• •